The Hatters

Mom, look what Bebe do to me!

 That's the little one (above), and this is my sister (below).

Bebe...my mom is feeding me..Leave her alone!

 This is my prince XD when I was walking around Pasar Atom with friends, I happened to see the cute hat (is it Lilo or is it Stitch?). I remember this little-cute prince, so I bought it for him. Unfortunately, he doesn't like hats. I made him wear the hat :P

Bebe, should I wear this hat?

The "Twins"

They even have the same initial!!! BJI
Billy Jehonathan Iskandar and Beatrice Jorianna Iskandar.. LOL

Here She Is XD

She was born on Nov 20th, 2010...
I went home Friday night with my brother. My sister had asked me to help my mom taking care of her firstborn... A very active firstborn, I must say.

Aku KO di hari kedua bantuin Mami momong si mbarep, sementara yg dimomong masih seger buger lari kian kemari.

Anyway, here she is...Beatrice Jorianna Iskandar :D

The 1.5-year-younger version (twin) of her older brother ;P

Like a cocoon

As I Turn 31

I had this strange yet vivid dream. There was my lil bro, two other of the Adiwidjajas, and I. We were sitting on a porch, facing a beach.
Then I saw my late Grandpa was on a solid cloud, writing something on 2 little pieces of paper. He dropped the papers, and they were blown by the wind toward us.
My bro caught them, but then the wind blew them again toward me. They landed on the floor, so I took the paper. I don't remember exactly the message he wrote, but it was for me.
The next thing I remember was I came near him by the beach, and he said that a man was going to meet me. When I moved closer, he took a step backward. I was very near that I could see him clearly, yet I couldn't touch nor hug him the way I did.(I miss you, Gramp)
And then I walked inside the building to meet the man I didn't know who. Before long...there you were! Looking for me, trying to surprise me...and you were succeed :) I was very happy in the dream coz you and Gramp were there.

In reality...yes, I'm so happy :D You did surprised me. Thank you.

Climbing Up The Mountain

I fell to a very deep valley
Valley of self-pity
I had pity party everyday
Didn't want to climb up anymore
Felt enough with everything
Didn't know the cause I fell

School became my runaway spot
Thought I could avoid
The very thing which broke my pride
....my failures....
They haunted and scolded me
That I'm a total failure

Forgot that I'm not
I'm not a failure.
How can I be one if
He who created me
is the Lord of lords
who ever prevail?

The truth of who I am in Him
Set me free as a soaring eagle.
That my worth/ pride isn't on my achievements,
perfection, standard, and performance.
My worth is simply because
I am created in God's image.

I'm climbing up the mountain
A hard work indeed,
and perseverance.
Doing it with my eyes on
the Hope Himself

No more putting my achievements,
perfection, standard, and performance
above ALL else!
No no no!!
It's Jesus who should be lifted up
high above all else.

That way, I could continue
the journey to my destination joyfully.
No more broken pride, nor dreams.
I put my pride in
who I am in Jesus only.
Good bye, Desperation...FOR GOOD!!

Yea...that's my experience after school holiday this year. What a downfall!! Never realized before that I still put my pride over my performance.

Performance includes our success in doing something; the way we dress, speak, and act; liked by everyone; doing something perfectly as our standards.

As a melancholic person, I tend to be perfectionist. I have my own standards of many things. Guess what? My standards are above average coz I craved for perfection. It made me depressed and unhappy (well, who could ever be happy when s/he is depressed?). Also, I caused my friends depressed too because of that.

My dear friend suggest me to count my blessings, never take them for granted.
Another friend gave me a book. It's not a self-help book. God used it to help me rise again. To find my vision and go with trusted friends along the way, be open and vulnerable to them, get ready to fail then rise to try again.
Jesus Himself reminded me of His promises and refreshed me with His vision. He strengthened me with new things, new revelations, new promises (Psalms 146).

I'm walking in His great favor and grace :D

Memories

With Tough Lady this year (Easter)


With family in Bali this year holiday

(Using photoscape)

Another Thing About Daddy

This year school holiday, I went with my dad, mom, and lil bro to Bali as I've posted before.
During the holiday, my daddy was busy looking for a used car (Toyota). He got some offers. Each time, he would test-drive the car to check the machine. The other thing he always did was checking the body thoroughly. He has a pair of sharp eyes that knew if the car had crashed into something or not, no matter how fine the body of the car was.
He even checked the underneath part (I dunno what the term is). He did all those for ME :,)

Yes, I have a car now :) I go to school by car this week. On Monday afternoon, on the way home, I hit a car in a junction. I was very shocked. At first, I was panicked coz I couldn't shift the gear. So...I stamped everything I could stamp. As the result, I hit the car in front of me twice if not thrice :P
The terrible feeling everytime I remembered the scene when my car coming closer to another car still makes me shiver.

Luckily, the driver suggested me to meet his employee, and his employee happened to be at the Galaxy Mall...and parent of one of my school students! And...they live near my boarding house. She was very kind and understanding. We solved the matter peacefully.

After I got home, I called my mom and told her what happened. My dad was next to my mom, so he understood what happened. My mom said,"It's OK. Do you want to talk to Daddy?" Once I talked to him, I cried and I could only say,"I'm sorry." I remembered all that he had done getting that car. All the trouble and outcome to fix the car before I brought it to Surabaya.
I felt very guilty. Moreover, I had assumed negatively of my dad's response about it. It doubled my guilty feeling. I'm sorry, Dad :(

Anyway, I thanked God coz my car is OK. My parents support me to go to school by that car :D

I DON"T CARE!!!!!!

It was because I said,"Close the lid!!" to him.

Tell me what should I do in that kind of situation when my sister was screaming so loud?
Say it softly? Do you think he could hear it?
NONSENSE!!!!!

I won't say anything anymore to him.

Up To You

"Everything I do is always wrong!!"

Fine! I won't say a thing to you anymore!
Live your life as you wish, I don't care!

What Did I Do?????

So suck when somebody blame you for something that you didn't do.

This morning, I experienced it. Last night, my brother came home bringing geckos in a box. He didn't bring the key, so I opened the door for him. I was in his room watching Japan-Paraguay. As I walked out his room, my foot stepped on a small house lizard!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!! I never fond of house lizard. And when I saw him, he brought a box. I asked him what was it, and he said "Gecko". Automatically, I stayed away from him, and escaped to his room. (can you see the correlation?)

This morning, I asked him where he put the geckos, and he point to a place. Then, we went out to the patio, gathered with our parents, sister, and nephew. He went in first. As my sister went in, she screamed coz she saw him held a gecko in his hands. He got mad coz he didn't mean to scare her. He stormed to his bedroom. My nephew cried so hard, while his mum was numb...very shocked. I went into my bedroom and locked it. So much for a good morning.

Then, my sister apologized to him. And, unbelievably...he said," I was angry to what C deb said."

WHAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT?????? Get real!!! What did I say? What did I do?

Forget?

"In case you forget who you are, turn to the people who love you. They'll remind you how beautiful you are"

That's right, plus don't forget to turn to the One who loves you unceasingly and unconditionally with an ultimate love :)

Because of your value in my eyes, you have been honoured, and loved by Me
Isaiah 43.4a (BBE)

For I am certain that nothing can separate us from His love: neither death nor life, neither angels nor other heavenly rulers or powers, neither the present nor the future, neither the world above nor the world below---there is nothing in all creation that will ever be able to separate us from the love of God which is ours through Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8.38-39 (GNB)

My Heart's Desire

This is the key (...or the keys? :D ) :

Percayalah kepada TUHAN dan lakukanlah yang baik, diamlah di negeri dan berlakulah setia, dan bergembiralah karena TUHAN; maka Ia akan memberikan kepadamu apa yang diinginkan hatimu.

Serahkanlah hidupmu kepada TUHAN dan percayalah kepada-Nya, dan Ia akan bertindak; Ia akan memunculkan kebenaranmu seperti terang, dan hakmu seperti siang.

Berdiam dirilah di hadapan TUHAN dan nantikanlah Dia;
Mazmur 37.3-7a

Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.
Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.
Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.
Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him:
Psalms 37.3-7a

Your Love is Enough

Coz You love me that much
Therefore, Your love is enough.

Enough, I want nothing else
but Your love.

I'll rejoice in You
coz You complete my life.

The joy of the Lord is in me
that's my strength.

I'll keep on walking in Your covenant
coz I trust You.

I know that the best is yet to come
You'll give me the desire of my heart.

So, I choose to be joyful
rejoicing in Your Words,
fixing my eyes to the fulfillment
of Your promises.

It's Your Birthday :)

Dear Cousin Jo,
If you happen to see this post and would like to see where I got the elements for the card, go here and download them for free :)

Btw, I don't have the recent photograph of you. That's why I use that photo :)

And once again... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!! ^^

Mon Père

He is the only son. He had a stern father and mother. His parents were so busy that they almost neglected their children (had so little time with them). It shaped him into a rebel and a hard-worker. He won't settle till he gets what he wants. He'll do anything to defend the honor of his family. He's a tenacious man.

Since he didn't have an example of showing love, he also doesn't know how to express his love to his children. I remember days when he went home and brought me some toys and books. As far as I remember, he gave me only those during his going out of town. He rarely spoke to me and spent time with me when I was a child.

It molded me into a girl who loves time and attention given. I prefer somebody spends her/ his time with me than s/he gives me a present. Anyway I admire his tenacity and hardworking.

I am what I am today because of you. I'm going from restoration to restoration also because of you. I learn to know my Daddy because of you, too. So, thanks to you:)

Adorable

I made them with freebies from this site and some other sites which I forget the link (sorry..)