Dare to be Different

This morning I realized that I haven't totally submitted to the government. Could be seen in the simplest things: sometimes I still compromising, when I ride a motorbike in an alley, I don't wear a helmet. Yet, it's one of the rule on the street.

The Bible says that all governments comes from God, so we must submit ourselves to our governments.

I imagine if we, as the followers of Christ, do what the others do, we can't be the light and salt of the world.

Yesterday afternoon I saw Kick Andy in Metro TV, he interviewed an artist family. In the studio, there were Adi, Iyut, Uci, and Ayudia Bing Slamet. Andy asked several questions. One of them that caught my attention was this question: "Is there any burdens in bearing Bing Slamet's name?"

Responding to the question, Adi said,"It makes us think twice before doing something."

Uci continued,"We don't want people said: "Why! Bing Slamet's children are not smart."

Earlier on that very Sunday, Daniel Yanuar said (in my church) that a name was very important. We were called by our names.

Moreover, we're bearing our Father's name in everything we do and say. In other words, if we do and say everything that is contrary to the characters of God, we're disgracing Him.

So, dare to be different! Being the salt and light of the world are our calling as his children.

Finally, whatsoever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men.

Are You Going to Finish Strong?

I saw this video this morning during teachers' morning meeting. I've been blessed by this video.

Hope it can be a blessing 4u too.

Here is the link: http://www.maniacworld.com/are-you-going-to-finish-strong.html

Another Post about Jacko

Beberapa waktu yang lalu dunia dikejutkan dengan kematian seorang entertainer terkenal, seseorang yang sangat berbakat dan fenomenal. Berminggu-minggu setelahnya, banyak media yang menayangkan kisah hidupnya, pemakamannya, dan konser-konsernya.

Jujur, saya bukan penggemar beratnya (yah, ada beberapa lagunya yang saya sukai). Sewaktu remaja saya pernah membaca kisah hidupnya dan herannya itu membekas dalam ingatan saya. Saya pun mengikuti berita kematiannya, upacara kematiannya, dan dua konsernya melalui sebuah channel televisi.

Pada saat saya melihat tayangan konsernya, yang membuat saya terkejut adalah respon para penggemarnya. Mereka begitu antusias mengikuti lagu-lagu yang dinyanyikannya, meneriakkan namanya, mengelu-elukan dia, dan menangis melihat pujaan mereka. Saat dia mengangkat tangan dan menggerakkannya sesuai irama lagu, serentak mereka mengikuti tanpa perlu disuruh. Saya yakin mereka membeli tiket jauh-jauh hari sebelumnya, berusaha mendapatkankan kursi terdepan, berdandan sebaik-baiknya, mempersiapkan hadiah, membuat banner, datang sebelum waktunya, dll.

Saya berpikir,”Andaikan kita seperti itu terhadap Tuhan.” Dalam setiap ibadah, beberapa baris kursi terdepan adalah barisan kursi panas yang paling dihindari, ada begitu banyak kursi kosong sebelum ibadah dimulai, memuji Sang Pencipta dengan tidak sepenuh hati (berpikir,”Cukuplah aku tepuk tangan dan bersuara.”), datang tanpa membawa surat cinta-Nya (Alkitab).

Beda sekali respon kita terhadap bintang pujaan kita dan Sang Bintang yang sesungguhnya. Wow…tidakkah kita miris melihat hal ini? Marilah kita renungkan untuk siapa kita datang setiap Minggu dan untuk apa kita datang? Hanya untuk menyenangkan manusia sajakah? Jika demikian, kita tidak menempatkan Dia sebagai yang terutama dalam hidup kita.

Hidup ini bukanlah mengenai kita, tapi semuanya adalah tentang Allah. Kalau kita bekerja/ sekolah, itu untuk Tuhan. Kalau kita beribadah, itu juga untuk Tuhan. Apapun juga yang kita lakukan adalah untuk Tuhan. Lain dari itu berarti kita memiliki ilah lain.

Saya sedang belajar menghidupi Kolose 3.23,”Apapun juga yang kamu perbuat, perbuatlah dengan segenap hatimu seperti untuk Tuhan dan bukan untuk manusia. “ Bukan suatu hal yang mudah bagi saya, tapi Roh Kudus akan selalu memampukan saya melakukan apa yang Tuhan mau. Maukah Anda bergabung bersama saya menjawab kerinduan Tuhan dengan menghidupi ayat ini?

If Only...

I was shocked to hear Jacko’s death from my mom. I’m not a bigfan of him, but still. His death made me think about his life and learn more about him from the media. This piece of writing might arouse protest from Jacko’s fans; however, it’s my thought only. I could be wrong.

He was abused by his dad severely. Though Jacko said it made him who he was in entertainment world, but it’s how I see him: He saw himself as a victim of the past. He hadn’t release forgiveness to his dad, there hadn’t been any reconciliation as far as I know. As the result, he was a different person on the stage and off the stage.

I admire his dedication to the music, his talents (I like Heal the World, You Are Not Alone, also Black or White), his excellent preparation for his concerts, I like his performance (esp. in Black or White); yet, I sensed emptiness there. Lonely, afraid, pain… Though he lived in a glamorous world, I think he didn’t really enjoy it. Can you enjoy it when you have to go through a face surgery over and over, and a tight diet? Well, I can’t.

When I saw one of his concerts, I thought to myself,”If only he knew the truth, it would set him free. If only he found the true love, his joy would enable him to reconcile with his dad. If only he knew Jesus, really knew him, he would never be the same again. He wouldn’t see himself as a victim of the past, but a victor. If only…if only…”

Whatever I think about him, he was the most talented Afro-American, influenced many lives (I dare say youngsters in the world), and touched many hearts in his unique ways, loved by many, missed by multitude.

These Two Days...

Fiuh.... kemarin tu bener2 hari yang dimulai dengan ketegangan!

Kaya biasa, aku bawa tas ransel baru pake jaket. Ku berangkat naik bemo trus nunggu temen di tempat biasa. Eh, tempat biasanya itu PENUH SESAK dengan orang-orang tua yang antar anaknya untuk pawai dan drum-band keliling menyambut permulaan puasa! Kupikir sepeda motor rasanya g bisa masuk ke gang sempit tempat ku nunggu biasanya. Jadilah aku keluar gang, nunggu disana.

Dari pawai itu persiapan, mpe berangkat, mpe tempat itu jadi sepiiiiiiiiii banget, temenku g dateng-dateng! Karena g pake jam tangan (baterenya abis, belum kubeliin batere baru dari taun lalu) aku g da penunjuk waktu. Aku tanya ke orang yang punya warung deket situ, dia bilang jam 7.15! Biasanya temenku jemput jam 7.10, aku kontan kaget banget. G lama, kubuka jaket dan liat HP, tnyata temenku uda di sekolah. Dia uda car-cari aku di tempat itu, tapi g liat aku blas. Aku "ketlingsut" di antara sekian banyak orang. Air mata rasanya uda mau turun aja tuh waktu baca SMSnya!! Ku merasa kaya anak ilang. Trus, ku inget ayat hafalan pas ESC: "Bersukacitalah senantiasa. Tetaplah berdoa. Mengucapsyukurlah dalam segala hal, sebab itulah yang dikehendaki Allah di dalam Kristus Yesus bagi kamu" (1 Tesalonika 5.16-18)

Mau telp taxi tuh, tapi trus nyadar kalo di dompet cm tersisa Rp 12.000. Setelah berbingung-bingung ria, ku inget ada temen yg rumahnya deket situ dan berangkat kerjanya agak siang. Syukurlah, dia bisa dan mau! Sampe skolah tetep telat siy, tapi untungnya ku g da jadwal ngajar d pagi hari.

Nah, kemarin uda tau kalo temenku yang biasa kununuti g masuk skolah karena sakit. Jadi ku hubungi orang lain dan uda OK. Tadi pagi temen yang kmrn ngantar 'si anak yang ketlingsut', telpon. Tanya aku ada yang antar apa g. Dengan yakin kubilang ada (sekalipun hatiku rasanya pengen diantar dia jd nyampe sekolah pagian). Biz gitu, puji Tuhan, ku SMS orang yang bakal aku nunuti..tnyata dia g sekolah karena keadaan papanya kritis. Posisi aku uda di bemo, dan uang di dompet tinggal Rp 6.000! Hahaha jadinya tadi aku turun di ATM trus lanjut naik taxi.

Bener-bener deh! Padahal benernya tu Tuhan uda siapin bala bantuan. Yah, aku tetep bsyukur kok. Paling g msh ada uang di ATM hahahaha kalo g gitu g tau deh nasibku hari ini.

From Zero to Hero

Waktu dengar frase itu, otomatis pikiranku mengartikannya menjadi:
Dari bukan siapa-siapa menjadi pahlawan
Tapi beberapa minggu yang lalu, aku menemukan arti baru dari frase “From Zero to Hero”.
Bermula dari seorang teman yang memberitahu sebuah alamat blog yang inspiratif (aku lupa nama blognya). Ada sebuah artikel yang sangat menarik perhatianku.

Seorang anak muda Kristen yang baru saja mendengar khotbah mengenai mendengarkan Tuhan dan setia menaati perintahNya. Ia pun bertanya-tanya apakah Tuhan masih menjawab doa. Setelah hampir jam 10 malam, ia dan teman-temannya pulang. Dalam perjalanan pulang, ia berkata pada Tuhan,"Tuhan, kalau Engkau masih berbicara kepada kami, berbicaralah padaku, aku akan mendengar, dan aku akan melakukan apapun yang aku bisa untuk menaatinya". Selama perjalanan pulang, dia mendadak mempunyai ide yang aneh untuk membeli satu galon susu. Dia menggelengkan kepalanya dan berkata "Tuhan, Engkaukah itu?"

Tetapi dia tidak mendengar jawaban apapun dan dia tetap berjalan pulang. Tapi keinginan untuk membeli satu galon susu terus ada di kepalanya. Kemudian si anak muda ini berpikir ini bukan merupakan hal yang sulit untuk suatu tes ketaatan. Lagipula susu ini masih bisa dipakai untuk hal lain. Dia kemudian membeli satu galon susu dan kembali menyetir menuju rumah. Pada saat melewati sebuah perempatan yang menuju ke Seventh Street, dia merasa bahwa dia harus berbelok ke jalan tersebut. "Tidak mungkin" pikirnya dan dia terus menyetir melewati perempatan tersebut. Akan tetapi, pikiran itu tak mau hilang dari kepalanya. Akhirnya pada perempatan berikutnya, dia memutar mobilnya dan menuju Seventh Street.

Setengah bercanda dia berteriak "Baik Tuhan, aku taat". Dia berjalan beberapa saat sebelum dia merasa bahwa dia harus berhenti. Dia berhenti dan memperhatikan sekelilingnya. Dia berada di suatu daerah pertokoan yang tidak kumuh, tapi juga bukan daerah yang mahal. Sudah tidak ada kegiatan sama sekali dan semua rumah di sana sudah gelap yang sepertinya semua orang sudah berada di tempat tidur. Kembali dia merasakan sesuatu di dalam hatinya "Pergi dan berikan susu ini ke rumah yang ada di seberang jalan!"

Si anak muda melihat ke rumah tersebut. Rumah tersebut sudah gelap dan tampaknya si pemilik rumah sedang pergi atau sudah tidur. Dia kembali duduk di mobilnya dan berkata "Tuhan, ini kelewatan, orang di dalam rumah tersebut sedang tidur. Kalau aku membangunkan mereka, mereka pasti marah dan aku akan terlihat seperti orang bodoh".

Tetapi kembali dia merasa bahwa dia harus memberikan susu ini. Akhirnya dia berkata,"Baik Tuhan, apabila ini Engkau, aku akan pergi ke rumah itu dan memberikan susu ini kepada mereka. Apabila Engkau memang ingin melihat aku seperti orang bodoh, tidak apa-apa. Aku ingin menjadi orang yang taat. Pasti hal ini akan ada manfaatnya. Tapi jika aku mengetuk pintu dan tidak ada jawaban, aku akan pergi dari sini".

Dia membuka pintu mobilnya dan menekan bel di depan pintu. Dia mendengar ada ribut-ribut di dalam rumah dan ada teriakan laki-laki "Siapa? Apa maumu?". Kemudian pintu terbuka. Lelaki tersebut berdiri dengan celana jeans dan kaos oblong, sepertinya dia baru bangun dari tempat tidur. Dia tampak tidak senang melihat orang asing di depan pintu rumahnya. Si anak muda memberikan susu tersebut, "Ini saya membawa susu".

Laki-laki tersebut segera mengambil susu tersebut dan sambil membawa susu tersebut ke dalam rumah dia berteriak dalam bahasa Spanyol. Kemudian seorang wanita menghampiri dan membawa susu tersebut ke dapur. Laki-laki tersebut mengikutinya sambil menggendong seorang bayi. Bayi tersebut sedang menangis. Air mata mengalir di muka lelaki tersebut. Lelaki tersebut berkata sambil setengah menangis "Kami baru saja berdoa. Kami banyak tagihan dan kami sudah tidak punya uang lagi bahkan tidak ada uang untuk membeli susu untuk bayi kami. Kami meminta Tuhan untuk menunjukkan bagaimana caranya kami dapat mendapatkan susu untuk bayi kami".

Istrinya kemudian berteriak "Kami meminta Tuhan untuk mengirimkan malaikat dengan membawa ... hei, apakah kamu seorang malaikat?"

Anak muda tersebut kemudian mengambil dompetnya dan memberikan semua uangnya ke tangan lelaki tersebut. Dia berbalik dan berjalan kembali ke mobilnya dan air matanya mengalir membasahi pipinya. Dia yakin sekarang kalau Tuhan masih menjawab doa.

Kalau saya mau menjadi pahlawan, saya harus menjadi bukan siapa-siapa, atau kosong. Kosong dari keakuan dan keegoisan saya. Dengan kata lain menjadi hamba yang taat. Matius 20.26-27 berkata bila kita ingin menjadi besar, kita harus menjadi pelayan, dan yang ingin menjadi terkemuka, harus menjadi hamba.

Yesus, Guru kita, sudah memberikan teladan. Ia datang bukan untuk dilayani, melainkan untuk melayani dan untuk memberikan nyawa-Nya menjadi tebusan bagi banyak orang. Ia adalah Allah, tapi Ia mengosongkan diriNya sendiri, menjadi manusia dan mengambil rupa seorang hamba. Ia taat pada Bapa sampai di kayu salib (Filipi 2.5-8).

Saya jadi ingat kalau beberapa bulan yang lalu, Penatua Hanna berkhotbah tentang Yesus harus menjadi makin besar dalam kita, dan kita harus menjadi semakin kecil. Tujuannya supaya kuasa Yesus nyata dalam kita. Kalau kita makin kecil (taat Firman Tuhan/ dorongan Roh Kudus), kuasaNya nyata dalam kita maka kita menjadi jawaban doa bagi orang lain.

Sangat menyenangkan saat Tuhan menjawab doa kita dengan yang terbaik, tapi akan lebih membahagiakan saat kita menjadi jawaban doa seseorang.

I'm A Princess

I'm a PRINCESS by grace.
My palace is the Lord's presence.
A crown of righteousness I wear.
Humility is my robe.
I clothe myself with compassion, kindness,
humility, discipline, and patience.
My jewelry is a gentle and peaceful spirit.
Godly wisdom I have for wealth.
I walk on the path of righteousness.

I'm a PRINCESS in love.
My Beloved is the Prince
in His Father's kingdom.
His love saved me from slavery.
He loved me when I was a slave,
and when I'm a PRINCESS,
He loves me just the same.
His love is beyond my logic thinking.
I know what TRUE LOVE means
because of Him.
I am my Beloved's.
He is so wonderful, loving, awesome,
faithful, strong, and loves me so dearly.
His lips speak no lies.
Even so, there are times
when I cheat Him.
But, His love always bring me back
to His arms.
Does he ever angry at me?
Oh, yes, He does it in His sweet manner.
He says His feelings gently,
with LOVE and in TRUTH.
So, this what I want to do:
I want to love Him more each day,
talk with Him more, know Him more,
and honest to Him.
I know when I'm honest
He'll forgive and forget my wrongdoings.

I'm a PRINCESS in a battlefield.
The enemy tries to crush me
with arrows of fear and worries.
I put on my breastplate of integrity and
right standing with God,
tighten the belt of TRUTH.
With my head covered by
the helmet of salvation,
I raise my shield of faith and
the sword of the Word of God in my hands.
My feet wear the readiness
to share the Gospel.
I can stand tall after defeating the enemies
because the blood of Jesus covers me.

I'm a PRINCESS on a mission.
Live to serve my King of all kings.
To restore the broken-hearted,
to raise up foundations for
generations to come.
I open my mouth with understanding.
Words of LOVE and TRUTH are spoken.
So the world can see
that Jesus is the ONE TRUE GOD,
and they can taste His KINDNESS
all the time.

I'm a PRINCESS in the school of life.
So many subjects to learn.
Successes and failures color
my learning process.
The key to success is to listen
to my Advisor, my Wonderful Counselor.

I'm a PRINCESS who can fail.
Fail to put on my attributes,
loss in the battlefield and school,
and disappoint my Father.
Yet, it doesn't lessen my worth
in my Father's sight.
I'm still His precious and beloved
PRINCESS.
My Father will hug me,
kiss my forehead, and caress my hair.
With his gentle voice He will say:
“I can see your effort through the process.”
“It's okay, My child. I know you can do better
next time.”

Rise Again

Well, as Valen-CIA said in my chatter box, I’ll share the blessings I got from ESC. It’s a kind of leadership camp.

For quite some months, I’ve been facing a wall in my ministry. I’d tried my best to knock it down, but all my efforts ended in vanity. I felt discouraged, disappointed, and felt like wanna quit. The top of the top happening that made me almost quit (again, *sigh*) was two days before the camp. It was a big blow for me.

At first, my main reason for joining the camp was because most of my cellgroup friends joined it, and I wanted to experience it together. The secondary reason was I wanted to get something new from God. So, you see…I didn’t put God first. But in the pre-camp meeting, I’ve shifted my reasons.

And, the journey began. I’ve joined this camp for three years in a row. And everytime I joined it, I always get something new. This time, since the very beginning till the end, God touched and restored my heart.

A week before the camp, an aunt prayed for me and she said I’ve to pray for my dad’s and grannie’s salvation. I was shocked; I never guessed that their sins are so evil in the sight of God. Well, in some sessions, God showed Himself as a Father to me. Consoling and restoring my broken heart.

I’ve seen Passion of the Christ for so many times, yet it spoke differently during the camp. When Jesus was tortured by the Roman soldier, He fell, but rose again ready to get more tortures. At that time, I felt God said,”I wasn’t quit. For you, My child, I wouldn’t quit.” Tears rolled down my cheeks. He showed me what persistent is.

On the way to Calvary, so many people stood at the sides of the street, yelling at Him, humiliating Him; yet, His eyes saying,”I love you”. For the Romans who had tortured Him cruelly beyond humanity, for the Jews who asked Pilate to crucify Him, for the world who hates Him today, He died coz of LOVE. Softly, He said,”I love you. And you have to show it to your friend”. He made me see what TRUE LOVE is.

Some sessions made me realized that I’ve been driven by my ego in my ministry, not by God’s grace. That’s why I was easily disappointed and easily tempted to quit. My joy was like yo-yo, up and down. In a certain session, I responded to the altar call and really gave up my disappointment in ministry. And I was set free. I was enabled to forgive my friend who disappointed my so much, and love that person. I told my friend that I would walk extra mile for her coz I’ve received God’s love and I wanted to let her felt it thru me.

As for me myself, I made a commitment to walk by grace, not by ego. And really learn the lifestyle of Christians as written in 1 Thessalonians 5.16-18, Colossians 4.2, Ephesians 2.5-8, Ephesians 4.2, and Philipians 4.13. I learn who is God to me in Psalms 23. I learn about who I am in Matthew 20.26-28. They were only some.

I was taught to depend on Holy Spirit. The participants of the camp were given NINETEEN verses to be memorized! We couldn’t memorize it if not by the help of the Holy Spirit. Also to live the verses I memorized, to ponder it and do it.

The camp was over, but the school of life is waiting for me to apply those blessings and share them. So, here it is… I share it with you 

ADOPTION

The first Japanese comic in Indonesia was Candy Candy, as long as I remember. I love the story and the pictures. The comic was about an orphan girl named Candy who, in spite of her condition, was cheerful, active, selfless, funny, and care about others. Together with some other children, she lived in an orphanage. One day, a driver from a rich family came to the orphanage. He looked for a child to be adopted. Candy was chosen. She was so happy till she knew that she was adopted as the family’s servant. She had a hard time, but kept on adapting to her new environment. She faced mean and evil-mannered children, worked hard, woke up early in the morning, etc. To cut the story short, she was adopted (again) by a nobleman, a rich, kind, yet mysterious man. She adapted to her new life again. She learned how to dress, dance, ride a horse, etc. And finally, she reached for her dream, and knew the man who adopted her.

Years gone by from the first time I read this nine-volume comic. When I thought about the story, one part that I remember is the adoption part. Once, I had a desire to adopt a baby girl. In my mind, adoption was easy. I only needed to go to orphanages, looked for a baby, told the head of the orphanage that I wanted to adopt her, filled out some forms, give some money, and tadaa…the baby was mine. I had to prepare the baby’s supplies and needs. I had imagined of how I’d raise her, save my money for her, teach her, send her to school, and to be happy with her progresses. Unfortunately, the process is not as easy as I thought and I gave up the idea of adopting.

In the whole process of adoption, it will be me who show efforts, do this and that. Well, I am the one who will do everything. The baby will not do anything. All she needs to do is waiting, and do what she usually does. I believe that she doesn’t even know that there’s going to be someone who’d like to adopt her. And when the process is over, she’s mine. She has to adapt to her new environment, learn new things, new values, develop new habits, etc.

When I came to this idea, I saw the similarity with salvation and Christianity. It was God’s idea, He was the one who found the way, and He paid the price. He knew how hard it would be, yet (unlike me) He didn’t give up. He offers salvation freely, no terms and condition applied no charge. Nothing! We don’t need to do anything. Just accept. Believe that Jesus, Son of God, is Savior and Lord of our lives, and confess it. Once we’re His, we’ve to learn new things, new values, and a new way of thinking. Everything is new. Sometimes we have hard times to adapt, but it won’t change the fact that we still belong to Him and that everything is new. Our old self is no longer exist because Christ reigns over our lives, and He lives in us.

Sadly, many people don’t believe that salvation is given freely through Jesus Christ. They think that they must do some kindness in order to be saved. Salvation is not achieved by doing good things. It’s when we are saved, and then we’re able to do good things with a pure motivation. We do good things because we want to spread His love that we’ve received.

For those who are still struggling with your old habits, develop a new habit of meditating His Words. Never give up, friends! All of us, in some ways, are still struggling with our old self. Sins start from our mind. If we fill our mind with His Words, our attitudes and habits will reflect it. Keep in touch with God all the time. He likes to have a relationship with us.

You are so precious in His sight. Come to Him now and call him your Savior and Lord of your life.

I was born in a Christian family, yet I hadn’t called Him as my Savior and Lord. I began to know Him as He really is four years ago (2005), and my life is never the same as before.

A Letter for Daddy

Dear Daddy,

It's been some time since our last conversation. I'm sorry it took me weeks to talk to You again. I mean really talk. I've been terribly busy these weeks. I'm sorry for breaking my promise to You. I've promised to talk to You everyday. So sorry, Dad. And now I can only send You this letter. I'm afraid it's not a good news for You.

So many things happened, and I couldn't handle them well. I'm worn out, Dad. So very tempted to quit so much...

You know, Dad...last night I got an SMS from my friend. It brought a bad news for me. I was sad coz she couldn't see the big picture. What she saw was a certain part which she thought improper. I disappointed, Dad. Why didn't she tried to see it from a different point of view? If only she could see it from a different angle, then she could see a different picture of it!

I couldn't contain my disappointment, Dad. I read Your letters, but still I didn't know what to do. And I couldn't sleep. It was early in the morning when I finally fell asleep.

This morning I woke up extremely late. My colleague had already waiting for me when I woke up. I began this day in a hurry. Thank You we weren't late. At school, during assembly, my notebook couldn't operate well. The students were restless and became noisy. They didn't pay attention to You, dishonor You, Dad. I was so sad I felt like crying coz they (including her!) ill-treated You. In class today, I asked them to ponder James 1.22, and said I wanted to see a change in character. To have a Godly character, they've to do something new repeatedly till it becomes their habit.

Then I realize that I also haven't paid You the honor You deserve, I still do things for myself. Satisfying my ego when I succeed, and down when I failed. Forgive me for taking Your glory when I succeed. Help me to do whatsoever heartily as to You, and not unto men.

This afternoon, Dad, I give my broken heart to You. I don't wanna hold this disappointment any longer, it hurts me more than I know. I release forgiveness for her.

Dad, I want to learn to have an excellent response that is according to Your way, not my emotions. Through last nite happening, I understand that my response is not much different from hers.

Help me to live it out:
It is NOT a matter of being right or wrong, but a matter of response.

I'll see You soon, Dad.

oxox,
debby

Thank You

Thank you for not always be there for me
Teaching me to depend on my Father God totally

Thank you for not always submitting yourself
Teaching me to be patient

Thank you for not always say “Yes” to me
Teaching me to stretch my capacity

Thank you for not always be true to your word
Teaching me to trust Jesus more than any other and forgiveness

Thank you for not knowing that I can do something that you can
Teaching me to always learn something new

Thank you for saying “Yes” to me
Teaching to see a hope in the midst of hopeless situation

Thank you for submitting yourself
Teaching me to humbly submit myself to my authority

Thank you for caring for me
Teaching me to know how to live in a community

Thank you for the listening ears
Teaching me to listen to others patiently

Thank you for the comforting hugs
Teaching me to know that somebody cares

Thank you for the smiles
Teaching me to smile to brighten up someone’s day

Thank you for simple “How are you?”
Teaching to be grateful for small and simple things

Thank you for confiding in me
Teaching me to be trusted

Thank you for your friendship
Teaching me to be a better person

Thank you for accepting me the way I am
Teaching me to realize how precious I am in the sight of God
And see you precious also in His sight.

RELOAD!!!!

I believe that this year I’m going to have a great year with my students. Though I've taught them when they were at the first grade, and I know (really know) most of them. My first week was really hard for me. I've to fight my old paradigm about them. They are not the same students I taught two years ago coz they've gone through lots of things which shaped them. Another thing is I kept comparing them with my last year's students. That wasn't a nice thing to do!

However, some things are just the same. This year's students I'm teaching are nice, yet there are some students with special needs. And a student (Y) likes to imitate his classmate’s behaviors who happened to be one of students with special needs (X). Some weeks ago when I was teaching their class…

“Miss, X doesn’t want to join Mandarin. He’s been at the reading corner since Mandarin.”
“Miss, what are we going to learn today?”
“Miss, what is it you bring?”

They’re sooooooo…….. enthusiastic! And I only have one mouth (thank God) to answer all those questions.

I divided them into groups and asked them to learn about the life of some bible characters. I guided them with questions. I left them work with their group to approach X.

“Hi, X! Why are you here?”
“…”
“What are you reading?”
“…”
“Hey, I know you love reading books, and want to be here. But, look! Your friends are also reading.”
“Miss, excuse me, but can you look at this? Is it right?” asked a student.
I nodded.
“X”
“…”
“I know… you are not interested coz your Bible has only a few pictures unlike this one. But…”
“My Bible has no pictures in it.”
“Oh…okay, but I think you have to join the class. Come, back to your seat.”
“…”
“Do you think you’re doing a good thing?”
He shook his head.
“So?”
I took his hands, got him on his foot, and led him to his seat. Then, he became so apathetic, just sat there and doing nothing at all. He stared at nothing, and acted as if he were boneless. My patience-meter was going down with the other students kept asking me questions about their assignment plus I had to handle X.

“Okay, guys, time’s up! Stop working!”
I started to count with my fingers. The deal was when the counting has reached zero, the students must be in sitting position and be quiet, otherwise they must stand up for five minutes. It was zero when my eyes caught Y. He was playing with his friend. So, I asked both of them to stand up. One thing that surprised me was he kept playing with his friend! That’s why I separated them. I ran out of patience by that moment.

“Y, please stand over there,” I spotted an area near lockers. He went there, and put his head into the locker. It was funny actually. But instead of laughing, I said,”Y, eyes on me!” He did it just for a while, then he walked to the door and stood behind it, then went back to the locker. I continued my lesson and the students’ presentation.

After 5 mins, I asked his friend to sit down. I was looking for a place where Y could sit without disturbing his friends. I saw a chair near the whiteboard, so there he sat. Then, the bell rang signing the students to have breaktime.

I didn’t let Y out coz I’d like to talk to him. His response was so annoying, so rude, and impolite. I said,”Whatever you do, Y, I still love you. However, there’s a consequence to bear.” Finally, after a hard time of trying to make him realize that what he did was wrong, he said sorry IMPROPERLY! After he apologized properly, I hugged him and said sorry coz I had admonished him in front of his classmates. He cried, I waited until his cry quieted down, then I sent him out to have breaktime.

I went back to my table, prayed…and cried. I needed to come to my Father, and told him I couldn’t teach them nor see them the way He did. That way I reloaded a new heart from Him.

Ever since, I always ask Father to reload my heart, otherwise… I’m unable to go on.
It’s really a grace to go through everything day by day.

Anyway, I still believe that I'm going to have a great year with them.

A Portrait of True Love

From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on

I know a family which is shaken by the head of the family’s infidelity. Almost as soon as the ink on the marriage certificate dried, he went out with another woman. The wife could smell her husband’s game behind her back. Disappointment crept in her heart. She began suspicious toward every move of her husband.

The husband didn’t want to be proved wrong, attacked his wife verbally, hurting her heart even more, ripped her innocent heart. Her disappointment reached its peak, it opened the door for discouragement. Her brilliant eyes became dim caused by sorrow, and her beautiful lips no longer smile heartily. She committed suicide.

Yet, God has another plan from hers. She was saved by the doctors at the hospital. She still lives for her husband, loves him with all her heart though she couldn’t hide her disappointment. She also lives for her parents-in-law who loves her so dearly, for her children whom she loves so much but often make her sad, too.

Years gone by, her husband hasn’t changed the way she wanted. Yet, she still offers her sacrifices of thanksgiving to the Writer of her life. She learns to know her True Love, to trust her Father’s plan, to live in His grace day by day, to love unconditionally, and to be thankful in every situation.

For me, she is a portrait of true love in the broken world. A hero for every woman. She surely has flaws, but in the end, she’ll show up as a blazed jewel.

I also learn something from it. Love is not just an emotion or a feeling. Commitment is woven in every aspect of love. It can't be separated from love. I believe commitment is the element that makes the wife love her husband unconditionally (in good and bad, prosperity and poverty, etc).

When commitment is separated from love
IT IS NOT LOVE.

Love is...

Love is…
When you know that your spouse is not faithful
But you still love your spouse and be with that person for good

Love is…
When you know that you can’t go on
But you still keep pressing forward for the person’s sake

Love is…
When somebody disappoints you
But you still believe that person

Love is…
When someone has nothing at all to give to you
But you still accept that person just the way s/he is

Love is…
When you know somebody’s flaws
But you keep supporting and bless that person

Love is…
When you know that someone is heading the wrong way
And you tell that person the right way

Love is…
When the one you love need a space for her/himself
And you give it to her/ him.

Love is…
When I see you smile
And I smile with you

Love is…
When you cry
And I cry with you

Love is…
To rejoice together and bear burdens together
Knowing that we are one body
Designed as one
And together we glorify God’s name
In our generation

That What Friends (Calebs) Are For

“How is it?”

“It is great, the promise is true. Look what we bring from the land! Let’s go there!”

“Yea, let’s do it!”

“Whoa! Hold your horses! Yes, the promise is true, but I don’t think we should go. We can’t just go in there. Get real! The people are big!”

“Indeed, they are. But we can beat them.”

“Oh yeah? They’re big and strong… nice combination. We’re doomed if we fight them!”

“Yes, he’s right. The land eats the inhabitants. Moreover, it has giants there. We’re like grasshoppers compared to them. We’d better not go.”

Familiar with the conversation? I think that was how the conversation between Moses and the twelve spies held. Only two out of ten who were willing to do anything God commanded and kept their focus on His promise. The majority was looking at the situation at hand.

So, only Oshea son of Nun (later known as Joshua) dan Caleb son of Jephunneh, who whole-heartedly following God, who could enter the promised land. The other ten couldn’t see the good land. When we’re face to face with the disagreeness of others, or we’re struggling over something, a friend’s presence is like finding an oasis in a desert.

One day I felt abandoned and tired of struggling for my cell-group. I worshipped God, and He restored my soul. I was ready to move forward, to struggle only with Him. The unexpected happened! A friend gives his full support (until today). Patiently listens to me and struggles with me. How I’m blessed with his presence. I’m also blessed with two other members of cell-group. They never say “No” whenever I assign them doing something they’ve never done before. They do it excellently, beyond my expectation. God strengthens me through them. He gives me not only one, but three Calebs. Though they may not realize it =)

Are you struggling over something? Well, never feel abandoned. What I mean to say is, like Michael Jackson’s song, you are not alone! God provides, at least, a Caleb for each of us.

Where can we find the right Caleb? In a community who has fear of the Lord in their hearts. A community which loves Jesus above all else. Or maybe among your friends you’ll find one who loves Jesus whole-heartedly.

Apa sih, Tuhan?

Saya sangat suka bekerja dengan tangan saya. Maksudnya membuat kerajinan tangan . Saat saya memiliki waktu senggang dan suasana hati mendukung, bisa dipastikan saya mengurung diri di kamar untuk membuat entah kartu, hiasan dinding, pembatas buku, atau kue dari flanel.

Sebelum saya membuatnya, saya sudah memiliki gambarannya dalam benak saya atau dalam buku kerajinan tangan yang saya miliki. Setelah itu saya persiapkan bahan-bahan dan peralatannya, lalu mulailah saya mengerjakannya.

Saya yakin, bila saja kertas atau flanelnya bisa berbicara, mereka pasti mengaduh kesakitan dan mengeluh, bahkan memprotes saat saya menggunting sesuai pola, mengelem/ menjahit, memberi hiasan, dll. Mengapa? Karena bahan-bahan yang saya gunakan itu tidak tahu rancangan yang ada dalam pikiran saya.

Saya merasa hal itu bisa disamakan dengan kita. Kita adalah buatan Allah kata Paulus dalam Efesus 2.10. Kita dibuat untuk melakukan pekerjaan baik yang telah dipersiapkanNya sebelumnya. Allah adalah Pencipta kita, Perancang hidup kita. Ia sudah memiliki gambaran setiap kita akan menjadi apa, dan Ia bekerja membentuk kita sesuai gambaranNya itu. Proses pembentukanNya memerlukan “bahan-bahan” berupa kepribadian kita, karakter kita, pengalaman-pengalaman, dan kerinduan-kerinduan yang diletakkanNya di dalam kita. Bahan –bahan itu perlu dipoles dan dibentuk.

Proses itu seringkali membuat kita merasa tidak nyaman dan sakit sehingga kita mengomel, mengeluh, tidak bahagia. Hal itu dikarenakan ketidaktahuan kita akan rencanaNya dan kekurangpercayaan kita pada kedaulatan Allah. Kita perlu tahu bahwa Allah turut bekerja dalam segala hal untuk mendatangkan kebaikan bagi kita yang mengasihi Dia, yaitu yang terpanggil sesuai rencanaNya (Roma 8.28). Kita perlu mengetahui bahwa Dia adalah Gembala, dan percaya bahwa Dia yang bertanggung jawab penuh atas hidup kita (Mazmur 23). Proses pembentukan itu memang terasa panjang dan menyakitkan, tapi saat kita taat sekalipun tak mengetahui rencanaNya, bersyukur, dan bertekun dengan penuh kerendahan hati, hasilnya sangat lebih dari sepadan.

Saat kita mengeluh, kita gagal melihat Tuhan sebagai seorang Gembala dan tidak mempercayaiNya. Sebenarnya, saat kita dalam permasalahan, itu adalah saat yang paling baik untuk belajar mengenai ketetapan-ketetapanNya (Mazmur 119.71). Yohanes 10.14 berkata bahwa Dia adalah Gembala yang baik, Ia mengenal domba-dombaNya dan domba-dombaNya mengenal Dia. Kita mempercayai seseorang saat kita sudah mengenalnya dengan baik. Bagaimana kita bisa mempercayai Tuhan bila kita tidak bergaul karib denganNya? Kita tidak akan tahu jalan-jalanNya bila tidak bergaul karib denganNya.

Yesus rindu kita menjadi sahabat-sahabatNya supaya Ia dapat memberitahukan pada kita apa yang dikatakan Bapa kepadaNya (Yoh 15.14-15). Mau menjadi sahabat Allah? Mudah, bergaul karib denganNya lewat merenungkan firman, berdoa, dan menaati firmanNya.

NOKIA, multivitamin, madu...?

Pesawat telepon CDMA NOKIA saya selalu mengeluarkan suara yang khas beberapa menit sekali saat “sumber nyawa”nya hampir habis. Saya memiliki istilah khusus untuk bunyi khas itu, yaitu protes. Dia juga akan protes jika saya memaksanya untuk mengirimSMS serta mengadakan dan memutuskan sambungan telepon . Kalau NOKIA saya sudah protes, itu tandanya dia perlu makan alias baterainya perlu diisi. Saat pengisian pun dia tidak boleh dalam keadaan menyala, supaya baterainya tidak rusak.

Sama halnya dengan pemiliknya, yaitu saya. Saat saya terus melayani, roh saya akan kecapaian. Dan bisa ditebak bahwa pada saat harus melayani, saya merasa terpaksa. Mulai keluar omelan dan keluhan dari hati saya. Tidak lagi melayani dengan sukacita, mengasihani diri sendiri, berpikir,” Kenapa harus aku? Selalu aku! Orang lain aja deh!” Apakah hal ini terdengar akrab, teman-teman? Pernahkah teman-teman mengalaminya?

Itulah yang saya dapatkan saat saya merenungkan Lukas 10.38-42. Dan Tuhan juga memberikan “multivitamin”nya sekaligus, yaitu duduk diam dekat kaki Yesus dan mendengarkan perkataanNya. Bahasa kerennya adalah SaTe (saat teduh). Waktu kita duduk diam dan mendengarkan Yesus, ada suatu perjumpaan Ilahi yang mengubahkan dan menyegarkan. Saat kita mendengar dengan perhatian (tidak terganggu apapun), cara pandang kita terhadap masalah akan diubahkan, pikiran kita yang ruwet disegarkan, ada aliran sukacita, damai sejahtera dan kekuatan yang kita rasakan.

Akhir-akhir ini banyak multivitamin yang beredar berkomponen dasar madu. Madu, dari zaman baheula, sudah terkenal sebagai sumber kekuatan, sebab itu Mazmur 19.8-11 menulis begini:

Taurat TUHAN itu sempurna,

menyegarkan jiwa;

peraturan TUHAN itu teguh,

memberikan hikmat kepada

orang yang tak berpengalaman.

Titah TUHAN itu tepat,

menyukakan hati;

perintah TUHAN itu murni,

membuat mata bercahaya.

Takut akan TUHAN itu suci,

tetap ada untuk selamanya;

hukum-hukum Tuhan itu benar,

adil semuanya,

lebih indah dari pada emas,

bahkan dari pada banyak emas tua;

dan lebih manis dari pada madu,

bahkan dari pada madu tetresan

dari sarang lebah.

Hukum-hukum Tuhan (firman Tuhan) yang digambarkan lebih manis dari madu dapat menyegarkan jiwa, memberi hikmat, menyukakan hati, membuat mata bercahaya. Yonatan dalam 1 Samuel 14.29 merasakan bagaimana dengan hanya sedikit madu, matanya bercahaya.

Apakah teman-teman merasa capai akhir-akhir ini? Minumlah madu, yaitu firman Tuhan, setiap hari.