If Only...

I was shocked to hear Jacko’s death from my mom. I’m not a bigfan of him, but still. His death made me think about his life and learn more about him from the media. This piece of writing might arouse protest from Jacko’s fans; however, it’s my thought only. I could be wrong.

He was abused by his dad severely. Though Jacko said it made him who he was in entertainment world, but it’s how I see him: He saw himself as a victim of the past. He hadn’t release forgiveness to his dad, there hadn’t been any reconciliation as far as I know. As the result, he was a different person on the stage and off the stage.

I admire his dedication to the music, his talents (I like Heal the World, You Are Not Alone, also Black or White), his excellent preparation for his concerts, I like his performance (esp. in Black or White); yet, I sensed emptiness there. Lonely, afraid, pain… Though he lived in a glamorous world, I think he didn’t really enjoy it. Can you enjoy it when you have to go through a face surgery over and over, and a tight diet? Well, I can’t.

When I saw one of his concerts, I thought to myself,”If only he knew the truth, it would set him free. If only he found the true love, his joy would enable him to reconcile with his dad. If only he knew Jesus, really knew him, he would never be the same again. He wouldn’t see himself as a victim of the past, but a victor. If only…if only…”

Whatever I think about him, he was the most talented Afro-American, influenced many lives (I dare say youngsters in the world), and touched many hearts in his unique ways, loved by many, missed by multitude.